Before I am Famous

literature is something we infer after the story is told

An Allergic Reaction, Zebra Hair and Grand Theft Auto

Posted on | August 18, 2008 |

The director yelled “cut” and the actors dispersed. Caitlin Madison   won the part of the lead woman, an overweight serial killer. Her agent reassured her that many mega stars starred in a “B” film one time or another. Taking the part and the five thousand, Caitlin saw herself moving up the Hollywood food chain. She couldn’t wait to pull off the fat suit and face; her skin burned.

On her way to makeup, Danicka stopped her, “you did great today. You know you could be the next cult queen.”

“I don’t think so,” Caitlin laughed.

Danicka agreed. “yeah I know what you mean. By now, I hoped to have my name right after Spielberg. See tomorrow and good luck on your date.”

“Yeah thanks.”

The director, Drew, smiled and left through the back. Sitting on the ripped maroon swivel chair and waiting for Tommy to peel the fat away, she saw a faded, old reflection of herself. Tommy came in laughing and began peeling away the makeup. Tommy gasped. She looked at herself in the mirror and screamed.

“What the fuck, Tommy? Why is my face blotchy and fat?”

“I don’t know maybe an allergic reaction to the makeup.”

“What am I going to do?” She panicked, “I have a blind date tonight.”

“It should go away in a couple of hours. Put ice packs on it,” he suggested.

She checked her watch, “okay my date is in four hours, will it be gone by then?”

“Yeah should be.” He reached in the freezer and tossed her a face mask. She put it on and the cold soothed her screaming skin.

Changing back into her clothes, she called a cab to take her to Donatello’s to have her hair done. The cabbie chortled under his breath.

Donatello’s sat in between a liquor store and a pawn shop in West Hollywood. Caitlin walked into the ultra white salon.

“Hi Cait. Gina is out sick today. Is it okay if Jana does your hair?” asked Rain the receptionist/hair sweeping girl, “she is in beauty school still.”

“Okay no problem.”

Rain seated her in a chair by the window. A spiky brunette with peircings and tattoos came out of the back, “Hi I’m Jana, what are here for today?”

“Just a wash, highlights and a trim,” Caitlin answered.

“Are you contagious or did you have a face lift?” Jana asked.

“No it is an allergic reaction to the makeup at the studio.”

“An actress! That’s so cool! I want to be a hair stylist to the stars,” Jana gushed. It’s Hollywood, who didn’t want to be a star or associated with a star?

After washing and trimming, Jana wrapped the highlights in foil. Caitlin sat under a hair dryer and looked at People. Her day started at 5:30 a.m. and she’d been going at kit all day. Soon, Caitlin fell asleep.

“Caitlin, I’m so sorry, wake up.” Jana shook her. “I went on break right after I put your highlights in and then I had an emergency.”

Caitlin reached her hands up and felt foil. Jana quickly unwrapped the foil letting what should have been caramel highlights to white streaks. Caitlin shrieked.

“I could fix it,” Jana offered.

“No. You’ve done enough already,” Caitlin remarked and stormed out of the salon. Ripping off her cold mask, she hailed another cab to take her home.

After walking up six flights of stairs and opening her door, she stared at the freaky reflection in the mirror. “Maybe I should just bail,” she muttered. Caitlin turned on her computer and checked her email, a message from LAGUY1211 appeared: Hey Linlin, can’t wait for tonight. Don’t forget nine PM at Jopper’s Garden. I’ll have a rose. Always, LAGUY

She started emailing   and iming LA Guy months ago after he replied to her online personal ad. They wanted the same thing- a loving long term relationship, possibly marriage. She wanted to take it slow and most men lost interest after a couple of emails because she wouldn’t meet them. La Guy was different. It became a habit for the two of them to write each other constantly. He asked her two weeks ago to meet and she agreed.

“If he liked me without a picture, he’ll like me now,” she said and picked out a white summer dress.
She got out of the shower and the swelling had gone down some. Caitlin pulled her zebra hair in a clip and slipped on her dress. Stepping out in the darkness, she hailed the third cab of the day and went to the restaurant. The maitre d noticed her, “excuse me miss, we don’t serve your kind here.”

“I’m waiting for someone.”

Suddenly a man turned around with a rose. It was Drew.

“She’s with me,” he said and approached her.

“Drew, what are you doing here?”

“Waiting for someone.”

Could it be? Was Drew really LA Guy- hard ass, unapproachable Drew, the director? What are the odds?

“Are you LA Guy?”

His mouth dropped, “Lin lin  in LA? Well this is a nice surprise. What happened to you today?”

“An allergic reaction to the makeup, a dumb hairstylist, everything that could go wrong had to wrong today.”

He handed her the rose,” I like the hair maybe we can reshoot with it. Don’t worry I always thought you were beautiful.”

The maitre d led them to a cozy table by the window. They laughed and talked over candle light and Burgundy. They exchanged smiles, glances, and tender touches. While they waited for the valet to bring the car around, he bent down and kissed her. She giggled.

The young valet, possibly an actor wannabe brought a coal-black Corvette convertible.
“Wow, this is your car?” Caitlin asked amazed.

“Sure is. Restored this baby in the last five years. I just got it on the road a couple of days ago.”
He opened the door for her and she got in thinking, “he never mentioned the vette.”

With the engine growling and the top down, he shifted into gear and pulled away from the curb. Drew turned up the stereo and drove up Rodeo Drive. Over the music, sirens went off and blue and red lights flashed but Drew kept driving. A cop yelled through the loud speaker as Drew sped up.
“Drew what are you doing?” she yelled.

He didn’t listen but shifted into sixth gear. More police followed them.

“Stop this car, Drew. I want out.”

“I bet you never felt more alive then you do right now.”

“Drew,” she screamed as a cruiser from a side road slammed into the side and sent them spinning. The car crashed into a parked car and the air bags deployed. Cops surrounded and arrested them both.

While still wearing cuffs, a lady cop gave her a cup of water. The detective came and questioned her.

“Look, I know you don’t believe me but he is a director and I met him the restaurant because he also was my blind date. Look at me, this damage doesn’t happen in ten minutes. For two hours I wore a face mask to help with the swelling. A ding bat hair dresser forgot about me for an hour and half while she was doing whatever. If you ask those cabbies, they’ll remember me. Look, I believed that car was his.”

Another cop entered and whispered in the detective’s  ear.

“Okay Miss Madison. Your friend came clean. You are free to go,” he released the cuffs. Once she had her things, she walked barefoot to her apartment. Her cell phone rang. Caitlin answered.

“Hey Cait, how did the date go?” Danicka asked.

“You don’t even want to know.”

A special thanks to Mars at Chismis Today for help with this story!!

Category: weekly shorts

Comments

No Responses to “An Allergic Reaction, Zebra Hair and Grand Theft Auto”

  1. Eric "Speedcat Hollydale"
    August 18th, 2008 @ 7:47 pm

    Hi!!

    Eric “Speedcat Hollydale”s last blog post..WORLDS LARGEST RECORD BREAKING MEMOTAG : "The Technorati Twister!"

  2. Sassy Mama Bear
    August 23rd, 2008 @ 7:18 am

    I like it, the epitomy of a bad day.

    Sassy Mama Bears last blog post..100 Words ~ Faster

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